A review by Vision Magazine, Sydney L. Murray

A review by Vision Magazine, Sydney L. Murray


Sole to Soul – A Journey of Healing from Ego to Courage

Cultural shift begins with an individual shift. We often ask ourselves "how can we make better sense of it all and further be in touch with our truer self?". Sometimes it follows a crisis, a time when we feel that there must be a better way for us to be and thrive in this world. In this article we will explore key mechanisms of fear and love, and how to cultivate courage and forgiveness so that we can live our life with more peace and be more authentic. To experience a faster, more effective form of healing, we observe that our reality, as we know it, has two main components - the physical and non-physical. Our physical world, the world of forms, only represents a part of our reality. Because nothing can truly exist without energy to sustain it, our physical world is a partial reality because it lacks in the connection to the energy (non-physical) reality. If we identify completely with the physical reality, we lose access to its energetic essence. There always exists a dialogue between the physical and non-physical. It is the invisible connection between everything - the interconnectedness.This is the same dialogue as in “above and below.” Everything corresponds to everything else in a unified world, or like they say "everything happens for a reason". Accepting this energy/matter connection is key to shift our reality. However, the ego objects to this holistic awareness of interconnectedness by striving for complete separation between our physical (actual) and non-physical (spiritual) life. One underlying emotion that is always present with ego is fear. In an unexamined existence, our lives swing between the fear of being alive in the here-and-now and the fear of death. Once we relate the ego to our physical reality, we open the path to growth through our non-physical part - the higher self.


The ego is so manipulative

that it will relentlessly seek new venues

of intimidation through fear

so that it can justify its existence

and thus delay our progress.


To better understand the dialogue between the physical and non-physical, we can safely say that there exists a connection between our ego's identification with the physical reality, and the soul based higher self and how it connects to the non-physical. Our physical body has 7 energy centers (Chakras) that are key to tap into the connection between the physical and non-physical. The 7 Chakras system is a model where different body parts resonate with different aspects of the human experience and its connection to the universe. In this system, the ego projects on the third Chakra (Solar Plexus – front center bottom of ribcage) and thus the conditional aspects of love which need to transform and manifest as unconditional love in the fourth Chakra (the Heart). The conditional love, as connects to the 3rd Chakra and the ego, is foreign to the Universe which only acts on unconditional love. This boundary between conditional and unconditional love is the essence of the journey we are here to take. Moreover, the lower Chakras - one, two and three - are connected to our physical existence. From the fourth Chakra and above we enter the realm of the higher, non-physical existence. It is only through this higher state that we are capable of making miracles happen and thus make suffering cease. The more we tap into unconditional love, the more shift can occur in our life and around us.

Also, the deeper we go in awareness, the more we move away from ego identification into our universal and divine selves. One prevailing misperception is that it is “wrong” to be in our ego self, yet- we have to acknowledge all of our aspects before we can further shift. Often true shift in awareness is nearly impossible unless the body itself is more open from blockages. Energy blockages (e.g. trauma) easily register in the physical body as contractions and disease. The Mind-body connection is not just a cliché statement; both aspects of self have to be worked on in order to live a fulfilled life. A key factor in improving the mind/body connection is cultivating intuition.


Cultivating Intuition

How many times have you, in retrospect, felt you should have acted on your gut-feelings and intuitions? We are usually aware of our intuitive impulses, but often our linear mind doubts their validity. One component for cultivating intuition is imagining that within us, no matter what, we always have an open space available for any possibility to enter. If we live like we are completely full, hardly anything non-linear can come our way. In a full dresser, we may know exactly what is in each drawer, but - even if we don’t - it is still cluttered.

As an exercise, close your eyes and visualize a dresser with full drawers. In your mind imagine trying to fit anything into those full drawers, it's impossible. Now try to empty one of your drawers or just keep very few things there and make an agreement with yourself to always keep this one drawer empty. Focus on that one empty drawer and – even with all the drawers closed - know there is nothing there. Know that this empty drawer will allow for the new and, sometimes, undefined to enter your life. Sit with it, allow the discomfort of it. Now, open your eyes and begin to notice how holding this empty space projects itself into your actual life. This is an exercise in reducing density in our lives which is the pre-requisite for increasing our intuition. It is also vital to aspire to remember dreams and try to take a look at their possible message. Dreams are usually the fruit of our subconscious and as such bear a connection to our higher self. The ability to relate to our dreams symbolically (e.g. by using a dream dictionary) is a gateway to the capacity to listen to our higher self, hence the cultivating of intuition.



Part of emptying the drawer to leave space for our intuition to emerge can be achieved through forgiveness. A big chunk of our inner chatter has to do with unresolved life situations. Forgiveness can help to let go of the “he said, she said” chit-chat and allow us to clear the drawer to make space for the new. Ultimately many memories and resentments go back to the ego whose supreme antidote is forgiveness. Interestingly enough, the colon or large intestine represents forgiveness in Holistic Reflexology. When the colon is physiologically detoxified—as through colonics or cleanses—it parallels emptying the drawer and releasing clutter that no longer serves us. This emptying allows for a vacant space that may invite in fresher experiences.

If forgiveness proves hard to come by, visualize a forgiven world where sincere apologies and kind actions replace all misgivings. Notice that our attachment to past events is a stumbling block to our growth. I am not recommending that we quickly rush to forgive. Doing so can turn out to be simply lip service and has nothing to do with a sincere release of blame. Instead, aim attention at engaging in the process of forgiveness where our heart and mind both take part. This may take longer, but it will be more authentic. The intention to forgive will by itself open the pathway to forgiveness. Set your intention with love and you will be set free from the burdens of blame.


Cultivating Forgiveness

What often holds us back from releasing our ego is our lack of forgiveness. While there is meaning to owning each moment of our experience, it is part of our soul work to constantly release those experiences. Only people who carry pain in themselves will want to hurt us. Loving them - and thanking them for the experience - will release our attachment to the event. Our self-esteem is greatly affected by other people’s judgment toward us. Once we establish an inner core--a peaceful center that is ours only and no one else can enter--we realize that at that moment we heal our misperceptions and judgments of others. These misperceptions and judgments are fear projections from others. They can only affect us as much as we carry the same fears in us; fear of inadequacy, fear of ridicule, fear of not being good enough.

Stop and think; the past is a fact - we can’t change the facts. Yet, just because it happened, it does not mean it needs to linger. Only we can reflect on it and derive the best answers to make our life better now. Only we can learn to nurture ourselves and attract what we need. By releasing our attachment to the past we allow the infinite wisdom of the Universe to permeate and heal us. Our attachment to the past affects the way we breathe and even the flow of our bowel movements! It is known that constipation is often a symptom of not being able to let go.

As adults, we can’t blame our parents for what we have or have not become. To do so, means that we take no responsibility for our thoughts, feelings and actions. Besides, we can't change the past. Our past is our point of departure - definitely not our destination. The more challenging our past was the more fuel in our engine. More power to you! Embrace the beautiful nature of the “good and bad” polarity. Nothing can be very bad unless it is so perceived by us. Our perception judges it all as good or bad. The fact is that some of our worst experiences can be the best things to ever happen to us - a wake-up-call like no other!


Three Steps to Cultivate Forgiveness

  1. Think of an experience in your life where you felt emotional pain. Observe the feeling.
  2. Give thanks to the circumstance of the experience - for bringing you the experience and the pain and discomfort it caused in your life.
  3. Give thanks to the people involved in the experience – including you. Thank everyone involved for their participation in bringing you a necessary life lesson.

Congratulations, you just got closer to releasing an unneeded pattern! Giving thanks releases you from the need to repeat these experiences in this life. It will help to connect your ego self to your higher self. It is important to note that from the ego’s standpoint there is nothing to be thankful for. How can we thank people/events that hurt us? Remember, this is an exercise in soul evolution. The soul does not judge “good” or “bad”. This judgment is the ego’s job.


Cultivating Courage - Exploring from Within

Many answers are given once we are on the path of self-realization. The main ingredient with which most self knowledge manifests is courage. We can have all the answers, yet paralysis can still stifle our acting. Thought without action is incomplete. Courage is the ability to act without knowing what the results will be ahead of time. Courage is the bridge from frustration to self-realization. It is the stepping out of time and--from that moment of eternity--acting / speaking in a way that embodies love, compassion and wisdom. Courageous actions inspire and encourage our experience of belonging, worth and fearlessness. Wisdom is a collection of courageous actions that bring forth a way of being that is the source of all phenomena.


Courage: Actions that lessen suffering and express our unity.


Five Steps to Becoming Courageous

These five practices—when carried out with trust--create a more courageous and authentic life.

      1. Join in and embody a life story bigger than your own comfort and survival.
      1. Learn by examining your experiences and stories about your fears.
      1. Build competence - by using your will - to stay present and act when afraid.
      1. Practice faith and patience - take positive action even when you see no positive outcome immediately, soon or ever.

      2. Pat yourself on the shoulder and acknowledge when you feel that you acted courageously and more and more acts of courage will manifest in your life.

By living a story bigger than our own comfort and survival we tell the Universe that we are able to expand our reality and that we don’t identify with the limitations imposed on us by the fear-based perceptions – our ego. If fear was the opposite of courage, then by examining how fear plays a role in our life events we re-examine our choices and see to what extent fear truly affects our decisions. The most common reaction to fear is not being in the moment. Examine how you are staying present in times of fear. Notice your breathing patterns and your overall balance in order to attain a firmer grip on that moment. Then you will begin to release your attachment to patterns of fear.

All this is possible through cultivation of faith and patience. Act lovingly upon your heart's impulses in spite of what your logic tells you. These positive action patterns establish a dialogue with the Universe where doors are opened as we move beyond our ego's limitations. In developing courage our existence becomes a part of a greater picture; one that extends beyond our own life in direct relation to others and the world. As our vision expands we connect with the oneness, the unity and the interconnectedness that is the source of all phenomena.


Love, forgiveness and courage are not just feelings - they also manifest through acts. Acts of forgiveness, courage and love defy and break the limitations of the ego and allow for true growth and expansion. This is the ultimate shift from Ego to Love-based life – a resonance that transforms our linear reality and aligns us with the universal frequency of expansion and abundance.


Ariel A. Talmor is an author, intuitive healer and reflexologist. In his new book "Sole to Soul - How to Love and Heal" he explores the sole-soul connection with key mechanisms for self realization, manifestation and growth. Ariel's inspiring healing work has been acknowledged by many, including bestselling author Louise L. Hay.